For my son, i just completed the ebay transaction that i hope to become famous for.  The purchase: 4 trading cards that ethan dreams about.  I know how he feels.  I dreamed about horses from the time i was his age until i became a teenager and boys finally became worth dreaming about.  (I probably should have stuck with the horses) 

Ethan tells me over coffee some mornings, in the before-dawn hour, the dream he just woke up from, how he has the these three cards and he's winning the yu-gi-oh game with them.  His eyes have a glimmer in them.  I know a wish when i see it.   i know he wishes more than anything that he could have those cards.  He's already saved 30 dollars toward the cost of them.  He's never saved that much for anything before. 

I'm trembling.  The last seconds of the auctions were heated, and i am thankful for the anonimity of ebay, or those card playing geeks that i outbid might come looking for me.  There were at least 4 bids placed in the last 40 seconds of the auction.  I am still a bit shocked that i won.

I never thought i'd be able to make his little dream come true.  Most auctions for these cards end at no less than $50, but i got them, plus an extra card, for $33.  I hope i can save them, save this secret, until his birthday at the end of the month.

How could i be so lucky?  In one day, i have made a little boy's dream a reality and got a good deal doing it.

Currently Church Music By David Crowder Band see related

Why do they grow up so fast?

Currently The Heat By Needtobreathe see related

Andrew, my budding artist, truly has all the traits of  good one.   His melancholy hands had wadded up three started works-all failed apple trees-and his sad face showed his disappointment in himself.

I sat with him and encouraged him to make an imperfect tree.  He did.  It was a beautiful tree with 7 apples, round and red, each with its own brown stem.  He finished the tree and was pleased, so he decided to cut it out.  (At age 6, everything good gets cut out.)

The tree was very detailed, and as he looked over it with scissors ready, he paused and said, "This is going to be really hard."  He sighed, set his shoulders, and said to himself, 

                                           " One chop at a time..."

Coming back to xanga is like opening my journal after 6 months of life.  There is an overwhelming need to race through information to catch up to myself on paper.  I will resist that need.  It crowds  out what i want to say with what i need to say. 

Africa has been in my head.  The little girl, probably age 6, carries her baby sister on her back, walks through the village, perhaps waiting while her mother sells produce in the market. 

I saw the face of a 10 yr old big sister who wanted desperately to be a child.  She was trying to jump in an inflatable jump room at a music festival.  She was holding a toddler, looking longingly at her mother, and trying to be a child.  She was trying to jump.  She finally told her mother how difficult it was to jump while holding her baby sister, and the mother replied, "See if your brother will hold her".  The mother was busy babysitting the empty stroller.  And the 10 year old girl never got to jump.

I want my kids to jump with their arms in the air. 

While they still want to jump.